I hope you’re all doing great?! Today’s post is all about (some of) my struggles with becoming a better me.
When I hit puberty I was a very troubled teen, no I didn’t do drugs or jumped at everything that came my way but I was a tantrum-throwing-little a**, I talked back at my mom and siblings, I loved getting into fights and always won them and that made me feel good about myself, but as time went on and years passed I grew up and I realised that’s not the person I wanted to be, I wanted more out of life, I wanted people to look at me and say ‘she’s such an inspiration’, so I stopped with all the troublesome behavior and started my healing journey silently (I’ve tried pointing it out at some point).
Over the years I’ve fought my ego, but I’ve realised that people (family) close to me will never let me forget who I was. I’m reminded every single day that I love to throw tantrums, I’m not allowed to get mad and not allowed to express how I really feel, because even when I’m genuinely hurt it will always be a tantrum to them.I’m not saying I’m a sweetheart but my good is as my bad, they balance each other out. There’s a saying that people don’t change, and that’s very true people will never LET YOU change even when you’re willing to.
Now don’t get me wrong I love my family but I wish they understood me just as much as I do them, I use to believe that home is where the heart is, but I guess I haven’t found my home yet.
Are you content with who you are?
Till my next post…